Sexual Empowerment for Women

How to Be Fully Alive and Treat Our Feelings as Messengers and Resources with Sybille Biedert

January 07, 2024 Tarisha Tourok Season 1 Episode 27
Sexual Empowerment for Women
How to Be Fully Alive and Treat Our Feelings as Messengers and Resources with Sybille Biedert
Show Notes Transcript Chapter Markers

Feelings aren't just felt, they're a gateway to profound transformation, and who better to guide us on this journey than Sybille Biedert, a luminary in the field of open-floor movement and emotional literacy.

We discuss how to harness the raw power of our feelings to create more connection, aliveness and presence.

Sybille's wisdom unveils how fully embracing anger, fear, sadness, and joy unlocks a more fulfilled and joyful existence.

We also unpack the essence of 'radically alive' spaces—where authenticity thrives and individuals, particularly women, can stand in their power.

If you're seeking alignment within your various bodies—physical, emotional, mental, and energetic—and a grounded presence that radiates from within, this episode is your call to awaken to a life danced to the full spectrum of emotional rhythms.

About Sybille

Sybille is a trained Open Floor Movement teacher, and a life coach, focusing on emotional literacy and embodiment. 

She is skilled in empowering people with practical life tools that are easy to implement in their daily lives.

Sybille helps people to align and connect with their Physical, Emotional, Mental and Energetic Body. 

www.embodiedfreedom.co.nz

Your host:

Tarisha Tourok is the founder of the Sexually Empowered Radiant Woman movement where women learn how to become radiant, confident and own the power and beauty of their sexuality no matter their size, shape, age or race.

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Speaker 1:

If I want to feel my joy. Joy is one of the four feelings, the core feelings anger, fear, sadness, joy. I can't have one of them and not the other three. So if I want to feel joy, I also need to embrace. What am I scared, sad, glad about as well, and also those carry and hold the information. What I'm really angry about is also what I really care about, what's super important for me. What I'm scared about is what I need to create. Hello everyone, and I'm Tarisha, and today I want to talk to Silbila Beidet.

Speaker 2:

And she's going to be presenting at Chak Tashiva Festival and if you're curious, please take a look. My name is Sudeva Beidet and I'm a member of the Chak Tashiva Festival. I'm a member of the Chak Tashiva Festival. I'm very excited to be part of the Chak Tashiva Festival and she's going to be presenting at Shakhtar Shiva Festival and she's trained in open-floor movement and she's a teacher, she's a life coach and she helps people to focus on emotional literacy and embodiment. So we're going to be talking about what does it mean to actually be embodied? And she's really skilled in empowering people with practical life tools. So I hope today she might share some practical life tools.

Speaker 2:

And if you want to have more of Sibila, you can come to the Shakhtar Shiva Festival where she's going to be teaching a couple of workshops. And also the piece that, Sibila, that I really want to talk to you about is that you help people to connect the physical, emotional, mental and energetic body, and that's, you know, sounds quite a big piece of work. So I wonder what you mean by that. And yeah, welcome, so happy to talk to you today. So wave, if you're in and if you can tell us. Yes, Sibila, like, how did you count it this week. Just say a couple of things about yourself so people can connect to you.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, thank you for inviting me in here and thank you for being here. I feel joy coming to the Shiva Shakthi Festival soon. The festival season has started and, yeah, it'd be my first time coming to Auckland. Your question yeah, it's a big body of work and about me besides doing this work, I'm also a mum of teenagers. I'm very passionate about multi-generations, very passionate about young adults, and it's a big motivation. What keeps making me grow? Also, spending time with them keeps making me keeping young, and I live in communities, so I've had a lot of community experiences living here for 20 years. Wow, and I, yeah, and there's this really deep passion about community living, where I really have sense that there is something else that is so much bigger than the individual when people live together, and the power of kubantaligence.

Speaker 2:

And so I wonder how did you come to do the dance in the embodiment? Is it through a personal journey?

Speaker 1:

Yes, yes, for me it's like I started moving from a really young age.

Speaker 1:

So I remember still dancing in my cellar as a teenager just too heavy metal, trying to like what the fuck was going on, what is going on in the world, and just using that as a tool from a really young age.

Speaker 1:

And when I grew older, I wanted to find other ways of movement and I actually started with holding aerobic and then dance aerobic and then hip hop. So my and then came across five rhythms and the journey continued until I found open floor movement practice and then in the last six years, adding the modality of possibility management on top, mostly through my kind of pain, I got, yeah, like my family broke up, we went through a big breakup time and I had a lot of emotion, yeah, a lot of personal stuff going on, and so I found this other modality that was really dealing with and holding space for emotional literacy and how to be with the level of feeling and emotions that were alive for me, and because I was already holding space for open floor workshops, I just added it into my offerings and it became this fusion of community, open floor, possibility management and everything else I've experienced over the years growing teenagers and yeah, that's what embodied freedom kind of became through that.

Speaker 2:

That's really cool and I wonder what are these possibility management? So that's not the movement practice, huh. No, that's something quite different and you sound like we would tell the movement.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so in possibility management normally there isn't movement in the way how I have added it and there isn't anyone else who has kind of explored it in this sort of way.

Speaker 1:

And possibility management is really it's an initiation into adulthood kind of ongoingly initiative processes to really be a radical, alive, fully here person that is really stepping into adulthood, taking responsibility beyond self and really for the wider and for really being here and creating way beyond survival. And the main piece that also for me comes together with movement and possibility management is the deep beliefs that I carry and also have seen in people that feelings are resources. We don't have feelings to just have them, like nature doesn't make mistakes like this. We have feelings for reasons that our main resource to navigate life, to sorry my voice, to move forward and to get the information what is my next step, what is my anger, fear, sadness, joy, telling me and really being with this as energy and information to navigate life. So that's kind of the just bring that through movement and through processes and through sharings and in many different ways.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, because quite often now we put like, when we like the good emotions, science feelings, but not the bad ones, as we call them bad, we push them away. And what I find is when we push the anger, the sadness away, then we kind of have as much joy and as much fulfillment. They kind of go together.

Speaker 1:

Yes, yes, exactly. So if I want to feel my joy, joy is one of the four feelings, the core feelings anger, fear, sadness, joy. I can't have one of them and not the other three. So if I want to feel joy, I also need to embrace. What am I scared, sad, glad about as well, and also those carry and hold the information. What I'm really angry about is also what I really care about, what's super important for me. What I'm scared about is what I need to create.

Speaker 2:

For someone who is listening, like what would be the first step for them to start listening to their emotions.

Speaker 1:

The first step is anger. The anger creates the safe space where, if I can feel my anger, I create an inner structure and a safe space for me to feel the other feelings. So anger is often the first feeling. Like if you open a drawer, everyone has this drawer in their house, everyone. The drawer that has a million cables in and the input cable and everything is like somewhere in there and you start pulling on one cable and all of them come out. So anger is the first one. Anger creates the space, the structure for the other feelings to come. So I work a lot with introduction to what we call Rage Club, conscious anger, to really allow to have a voice and to allow ourselves to feel again, after most of us are quite numb and especially anger has so much stigma of being not welcome because it's been used unconsciously so much and yet it has so much fire and passion and boundaries and clarity. So yeah, my recommendation is to start with that because that creates the space to be able to meet.

Speaker 2:

You love the Rage Clubs? Yes, and with that right, Because when I work with people, what I hear them say? Well, I'm afraid I'm going to hurt someone or people are going to stop loving me If I really tap into my anger. They didn't feel fear around it. So what can you tell about that?

Speaker 1:

Yes, and this is exactly why to practice it. So in in Rage Club, we all learn to calibrate our anger and to learn first to really also get to know. Get to know this energy, but then also to become aware when am I actually feeling it? In low levels, which is what happens in life. So, but first it needs to, that muscle needs to be trained again even to kind of wake up, and because we're doing it in a group, everyone brings it up and brings it down.

Speaker 1:

It is all about exactly like learning how to calibrate it, getting to know it, finding, finding really this wild energy in each of ourselves and, yeah, and really being in a responsible space where it's conscious and where it's where it's a really listening space of what is really going on and the practice, and also as a group, where it where the understanding that anger is bad is so big that practicing in a group with other people and and getting the seed of like, oh wow, actually this is welcome here it starts changing something and, yeah, becomes from unconscious into conscious and it's like it's kind of not being overwhelmed by it, right, Because when people get overwhelmed and then that can be destructive.

Speaker 2:

But actually when it's conscious and I'm actually can moderate it and I remember when I went to India and we had a, we had one workshop where for three hours we were just expressing anger in a kind of in a small space. We had to scream at each other and I remember in the beginning it was so scary and I was crying and I was like get me out of here. But with time I really started to feel the energies, passion, and then I only wanted to scream at people that I like because was wow, this energy is so amazing, it's so beautiful and I could never, if I didn't go through the experience like you, can't think your way through it, and I think that's where your way comes in, that we can think about it, which need to experience it. Because when I tell the story, people like really, but I just remember how powerful and I feel like that was, like that's what kind of really changed the direction of my life, that experience.

Speaker 1:

Yes, yeah, yes, and exactly that. And it comes back to that, this feeling as a resource, not something to suppress, and what you just talked about overwhelmed. Overwhelmed is really when I mix it, when I mix my anger with my fear and my sadness, and I, neither of them, can really feel. So that's when feelings actually become emotions and they get stored instead of really able to be moving. If I feel my anger purely, then I have the clarity of what needs to happen or I can really express something that is going on for me. If I do it responsibly, which would be, I feel I feel really angry because and I, it's my anger, it's not anyone else's anger, it runs through me and I can listen to someone else's clear anger, what they feel angry about, and I can also decode it, because in that I can hear what they really care about, and that is even beyond if it's very responsibly expressed or not. Someone is caring about something really precious.

Speaker 2:

And, yeah, it's like a CEO caring about it. It's fresh and that's why, then, gaze there. Yeah, yes.

Speaker 1:

So, yeah, like this is. This is totally what I'm passionate about and this is also why I created with some other woman. We created spaces called radically alive, where a whole bunch of young woman, where they're last year in November and we're raged and really taking a stand of what needs to happen in the world to make the changes. And it starts with me, it starts with each individual of first really doing my own work, clearing up my own messes of where am I, yeah, in survival and what healing do I need to do with my feelings and emotions and how can I practice to really listen to this resource and also my intuition, which is connected to my conscious fear. So it's all the different ways of being and very much that's what the authenticity compass is about.

Speaker 1:

So the workshop that I've been doing and she was acting is really an introduction to those four feelings and to get to know a bit this. Like what does it actually feel? Like sadness is connected to the healer and the community weaver and so. And anger is to the warrior, the fear is connected to the magician, the witch, and really in being a taster of those four feelings and how they relate, and how do I relate in community when I am feeling those four feelings. So it's a small introduction to into. That's why I call it authenticity compass, because it's like my feelings give me the clarity of when I'm being authentic or when I'm fake and I'm bullshitting and I'm trying to be something or trying to be nice and then it's not really real because I'm not really feeling beautiful, so it's.

Speaker 2:

and you talk about the purity of the feelings. Yes, so kind of experiencing them in their purity, and that's how the messages come through. It's when it's all mixed up, that's when we get confused.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and it's all like. And confusion is another form of anger, of mixing feelings, and then nothing can move and I get stuck. Same as depression.

Speaker 2:

And I like to use the kids.

Speaker 1:

Yes, so right now, for example, I'm using like 6% of conscious anger to project my voice to really create presence. So that's what we're going to talk about, and the embodied being workshop that I would be holding, also at Shiva Shakti, has a bit more connection to self. So it's really about creating a being space, a more quiet, internally connective space, which is always the first step. Before I can really connect, before I can connect with anyone else, I need to be in connection with myself and my own being. So we were before talking about the four bodies. So in embodied being, I will be focusing on really allowing people to come fully into their physical body through the movement and also through some exercises, and then also awakening up the emotional body, getting to know what's happening in my mental body and checking where is my energetic body, because the energetic body travels out and is busy with everything else. So it's really taking the time to bring in all these bodies together so that I can be in an embodied being, alive space and really be here.

Speaker 2:

So you've done the movement, other to do the center. It's kind of coming to your center, grounding yourself. Maybe, because we use them, body language words, kind of as everyone knows what it means. But actually what is your explanation? What is actually embodiment?

Speaker 1:

Yeah. So I have quite many different ways of describing and the main piece is like embodiment can't really be described because it's an experience. So when I'm really in all of these bodies, I'm consciously connected to what's going on in my mental body and I'm anchoring it in my physical body. I can feel my feelings, all my emotions are, I can sense them and it's connected to my center, to the middle of my body. It's a centered, alive experience of really being here in a very small, what I call like a small now, like this moment. I'm not out there, I'm not planning, I'm not with anyone else.

Speaker 1:

That is something out there. I'm not writing my supermarket shopping list, whatever. All parts of me are in here, embodied in this physical form, being here and connecting fully, and it's a pure level of presence. That's basically embodiment is practicing presence too, and I use the music and the soundscapes and connection to really allow people to do that. And why I find embodiment as a movement practice so empowering is because there isn't an agenda. They say, as soon as people start moving and they don't know how to move, they don't know what they're not going to do next. There is no instructions, there is really the spaciousness of arriving and that really allows embodiment arriving to happen in the moment.

Speaker 2:

Beautiful. Yes, and that's the piece that you're talking about. I'll just what's important, that we all miss connection, but actually we miss it because we're not quite here. There's no one to connect with.

Speaker 1:

Yes, Exactly, exactly. This is really like I can search out there and I want to connect with you and you and you and whatever. And if I'm not here, if I have not taken the time to feel my feet, to be in my center which can be also just a mental practice okay, I'm going to try to be present now and it just doesn't work. So it's really having to do the work and training the muscle of embodied presence, and then I can connect.

Speaker 2:

And again, if I can see people right, when people like, if we're just here, then it is right here, right in the head, and then when we go down into the heart, and then when we go down right into sexuality, into legs, into feet, it's quite a different experience of how we end the body and the other person like. The feeling is different.

Speaker 1:

And another part of embodiment and I guess on some level the music really helps with that is it is a place without stories, so the stories also most of the time connect us to the mental body, which then makes our energy goes outside there. So energetic body travels out, like through the music and through the presence that's coming together in a group intelligence, which is again what I feel, so inspired by it, because there's something else that happens when people come together with the main purpose to be present and practice presence and engage with each other. It also now I lost my thread. I feel distracted, but that's that's. Yeah, I lost it, it was something.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, but it's. That's the presence and the connection and how we can. Actually, when we're together, there's the power alarm group work. I've just finished my master's thesis on group work. Yes, when we're by ourselves it's more difficult, but with the group energy we bring it together and we can drop into that space of deep presence and connection much quicker.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and it is that purpose I was. I was wanting to relate to stories like that level of connection that is available outside while I'm making connection with myself, and the music on top and the offerings and the health space really gives a space where stories that are usually taking up so much space in our systems can just be dropped. And I have so many people who come to my five days retreats or whatever. They go outside and they go like wow, say oh, I had a full break of all this. This, this background, radio noise that goes on all the time, and then it's kind of it brings up a lot of feelings for people when they go outside and go like no, no, no, no, no, and then they just the stories connect to the emotion. So then it brings all this kind of like yeah, stuff that's been paused back in and then how to be with that without losing this level of embodiment and presence? I've just created it myself.

Speaker 2:

And I find then the callous and bright of the car. The trees are so green, let's get it, he's so blue.

Speaker 1:

Everything is more beautiful if I'm in connection and the the the difficult part of that is, if I want to be in connection, I have to ongoingly be willing to let go and ongoingly willing to, to, to listen and to slow down and to really be with what's what's really happening here ongoingly and to be able to admit and and really own the bullshit that I'm saying and the pretending and the fakeness, because all the fakeness, all of that takes me out of my authenticity, takes me out of my, my feeling bodies. So, yeah, so that's a lot what I'm about. I'm quite bold, I'm quite radical. I I bring things that people are totally go like whoa. So it's, it's not for the total, it's, it's really for people who are ready to, to do something different and to want to experience something different.

Speaker 2:

Well, there's following it. I know that's what I feel from you. Then this following confidence and kind of like certain till with yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, because, also, I, I move with this time Like there is like it's it's so important that that and that's what I stand for it's so important that community, that people can experience themselves again in community, it's so important that the woman come together and really support each other, and it's like the world needs needs to wake up, and I'm just one small person traveling and offering doors to feel, so that once people can feel and they can't be numb to what the what is going on, then they are naturally in the place of wanting to make the changes that each individual can make. So this is kind of my, my mission that moves me and I want to.

Speaker 2:

Then we're doing it together, right, that's the whole thing. Yeah, we're doing it together.

Speaker 1:

As a community, yeah, but for that we need to reconnect and find like, first connect here, then connect with each other and rebuild this, this network of that. We're not in competition comparing. We're all on the team of wanting to yeah with Gaia and and take care of what is what is needed and what is what really matters.

Speaker 2:

Love your passion and I wonder, if you just tune into listening to this, who is listening Like, what is it? What can you tell them? What's kind of last word, last message to them?

Speaker 1:

Yeah, if you have a moment today, give yourself the time to actually, if you have someone close by, go and meet them and allow yourself to lower your numbness in the way of really checking in, opening the door inside and share with someone else. What do you feel angry, sad, glad and scared about? And it brings so much intimacy. So the formula for that is like I feel angry because I haven't made enough time today to connect. I feel scared because I have so much to do and I really want to connect within. I feel sad because I keep losing this beautiful being that lives inside me and the love I have for life, and I'm glad because I'm right now taking time to do that. So, for feelings, check in is like magic and we will do that in the authenticity cumbers and also dive deeper into that in the workshop that I'm actually offering straight after Shiva Shakti at the same venue, which, I'm really glad, my first Auckland gig brought by Auckland. Auckland embodied intimacy exploration.

Speaker 2:

Well, thank you so much to be allowed. I'm definitely going to come to your workshop. I hope we're not clashing.

Speaker 1:

Yes, yes, yes, so too, because I'd like to come to yours and thank you so much, thank you so much.

Speaker 2:

We're happy to see you and Shiva Shakti Festival and, yeah, so nice to be here with you. Sibila and I went last year to Shiva Shakti Festival and it was such a beautiful coming together place. Really looking forward to being there again and I hope to see you there. Come and say hi to us if you're there.

Speaker 1:

Bye.

Exploring Emotional Literacy and Embodiment
Introduction to Embodiment and Authenticity
Attending Shiva Shakti Festival