Sexual Empowerment for Women
Welcome to the Sexually Empowered Radiant Women podcast where women learn how to become radiant, confident and own the power & beauty of their sexuality no matter their size, shape, age or race. Your host is Tarisha Tourok. Join She Desires: Discover 5 Keys to Unlock Your Desire & Reclaim Your Pleasure masterclass at www.shedesires.live. Free mini-course Reclaim Your Sexual Confidence https://radiantwoman.xperiencify.io/tarishatourokbody/order/
Sexual Empowerment for Women
Unlocking Your Sexual Desire: Understand the Sexual Desire Matrix to Transform Your Love Life
Unlock Your Desire: Day 1 - The Sexual Desire Matrix
Welcome to Day 1 of the 'Unlock Your Desire' challenge! In this session, Tarisha introduces the Sexual Desire Matrix, a powerful framework she developed to help women reclaim their sexual desire and enhance their lives. This training is ideal for women wanting to break free from restricted lives, connect with their sensuality, and experience fulfilling intimacy. Tarisha shares insights on the profound impact of sexual desire on self-esteem, body image, and relationships. Join this transformative journey to unlock the power and beauty of your sexuality.
00:00 Introduction to the Unlock Your Desire Challenge
00:53 Understanding the Sexual Desire Matrix
01:18 The Profound Impact of Sexual Desire
02:13 Real-Life Transformations and Testimonials
02:58 Common Struggles with Sexuality
03:50 Consequences of Lack of Sexual Desire
04:59 Statistics on Sexual Dissatisfaction
05:46 Connecting to Your Deepest Desires
06:35 The Benefits of Igniting Sexual Desire
07:08 Special Connections and Emotional Intimacy
07:47 Empowering Women in Relationships and Single Life
09:31 About Tarisha
Your host:
Tarisha Tourok is the founder of the Sexually Empowered Radiant Woman movement where women learn how to become radiant, confident and own the power and beauty of their sexuality no matter their size, shape, age or race.
FREE MINI COURSE: Unlock Your Sexual Confidence - Learn 5 Practices to Heal Your Relationship with Your Body & Your Sexuality
https://radiantwoman.xperiencify.io/tarishatourokbody/mini-course/
FREE WEBINAR: Women Over 40: Discover 5 Keys to Unlock Your Desire So You Enjoy Heart-Melting Intimacy
This is perfect for women who are in a relationship and feel frustrated with their love life, are single and don't want to repeat past hurtful patterns where they lose themselves and their voice, and women who want to feel confident expressing their longings and desires
Join Free Online where you'll learn 5 obstacles to your desire and 5 actionable strategies to activate your desire so you stop feeling frustrated with your love life www.shedesires.live
Visit our website at https://www.sexualempowermentforwomen.com to join the Sexually Empowered Radiant Woman movement.
Welcome, welcome to Unlock your Desire Challenge. Today we're gonna go into day one of the sexual desire matrix. By the end of this training, my intention for you to understand the powerful sexual desire matrix and how to apply it in your life. Then you can get deep insights into your sexual desire and how you can enhance it, what you can do for yourself so you feel more desire. When I talk about sexual desire, it's desire for life, desire for love. This training is for women who want to reclaim the power and beauty of their sexuality, who are done living small and restricted lives where their to-do list takes the joy out of their life. So if you want to bring your bigness, your fullness, to the world, this is for you, and it's for women who want to connect to their radiance, who want to bring your bigness, your fullness, to the world, this is for you. And it's for women who want to connect to their radiance, who want to shine brightly, even if you have past negative experiences, even if your current circumstances are less than ideal. Today's the day one. We're going to unlock the power of the sexual desire matrix. Tomorrow we're going to look at how to awaken your desire. Then we're going to look at how to overcome the barriers to your desire. On day four, we're talking about creating heart-melting and spirit-infused intimacy. Day five we're going to talk about how to sustain our desire and fulfilling intimacy. Today, we're going to look at why it's important to unlock our sexual desire. We're going to get clear on how lack of sexual desire affects women.
Speaker 1:I've done a lot of research around this. It affects us very profoundly, even though we might think sexual desire I might have it or not and it's okay but actually does affect how we feel about ourselves as women. We're gonna understand the sexual desire matrix and that's what I've developed myself, so you can't find this information anywhere else. Sexual desire is our innate drive that fuels passion, connection and intimacy. It's not just about sex. Sexual desire is our innate drive that fuels passion, connection and intimacy. It's not just about sex. It's a fundamental aspect of being a human. It's not just about sexuality, but it's about being fully alive, being connected to ourselves, to nature, and to become amazing lovers. All we need to do is become responsive to love, to pleasure, to touch, to human connection. The impact of sexual desire on women's lives it's big. It does contribute so much to how we feel about ourselves, to how we feel in our bodies.
Speaker 1:That's one of my clients, brianna. She was saying that prior to learning the sexual, impotent and woman myth, everything felt like a pretense. She was going through the motions, but there was not much joy. She felt like a big part of herself was missing. When I've done my research, it happens again and again that we feel like a part of us is missing when we're not connected to our sensuality, to our sexuality. Then she said, so much has shifted for her that she was able to connect to her divine feminine self, to her source of power, and now everything feels incredible and ability to speak up and understand herself really changed her relationship with her partner. That's what women say that sense of sensuality, sexuality is so connected to our power as women.
Speaker 1:Maybe you had enough judging yourself. Maybe you had enough of feeling guilt and shame around your sexuality. I see it again and again. It happens so often. Maybe you had enough of feeling guilt and shame around your sexuality. I see it again and again. It happens so often. Maybe you had enough feeling dull, feeling disconnected from pleasure or being sexually unfulfilled. When women start to feel sex is a chore so painful and frustrating for me because sexuality is such a beautiful part of us but when we feel it's a chore it's for our to-do list, something I have to give to my partner it really takes away the joy, the pleasure. I hope you do feel my big, warm heart coming your way now, and I really know how much women struggle with this and some women don't right, but from the research I've done, at least 30% of us struggle with our sexuality. I know that you are here because you want to experience something different. You want to experience the power, the beauty of who you are as a woman. I celebrate you for that.
Speaker 1:So this is how lack of sexual desire affects women. It's that we have reduced self-esteem and our body image suffers and we feel emotionally disconnected with our partners and we might feel emotionally disconnected with ourselves as well. It brings stress and anxiety. Lack of intimacy really destroys relationships and I work with couples and I see how we might think it's about something else, but if there is no fulfilling sexuality and no emotional connection, relationships fall apart. Too many women I work with they feel that emotional gap between them and their partner, but sometimes they just come for help too late and it's too painful. Quite often partners already got so frustrated without the lack of intimacy, sexual intimacy, so they might have left. Emotionally, then it's more difficult to actually bring that connection back. I know that also. Lack of desire crushes our confidence. It crushes our self-esteem because our desire for love, for life, is just so crucial to feeling happy. It's crucial to feeling fulfilled and feeling whole.
Speaker 1:Also, lack of affection. When we don't have sexual desire, women might start avoiding their partners, but then they miss on the affection, because all of us want that affection, want to feel held, want to feel cherished, and we miss on that. The research I've done is that 43% of women reported sexual dissatisfaction. That's a big number. Right, it's half of us, and I'm sure it's more than that and it's according to some studies that are different researchers, but that's quite a big number. Then, 30 women report low sexual desire right, it's one third of us. 91% of women reported dissatisfaction with at least one aspect of their physical appearance. So we judge ourselves so strongly.
Speaker 1:I know that you are here because you're ready to feel confident and attractive and radiant in your own skin. You're ready to feel desired and desirable. Do you want to experience ecstatic, heart-melting intimacy with a partner? I know that to be true, that's deeply when I talk to women and we go to the depth of what they want. All of us just so want affection. I wonder, even right now maybe you can close your eyes or just lower your gaze, but feeling what is my deepest desire? Why am I here? What is it that I want? What is it that I'm missing in my life that feels? Oh, this longing, connecting to your longing, and what is it to your longing and what is it you can post in the comments? I'm seeing your comments. What is your deepest desire? Why are you actually here? Why are you spending this hour here with me? What's in it for you? What do you feel you're missing? And so your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to understand the sexual desire matrix and learn how to apply it in your life so you unlock the power of your sexual desire and enjoy heart-melting and spirit-infused intimacy.
Speaker 1:These are the benefits of igniting our desire is that we start living life to the fullest, we start to feel confident, free and desirable and we can bring that spark back. It's just so beautiful when partners start to look at each other with that spark right, with that affection, with the love, and then you can experience emotionally connected sexuality and heart-melting intimacy. For me it's such an important piece. It's not just about sexuality, but it's sexuality connected to the heart, and then you'll be really feeling adored by your partner. That's what's possible because it's such a special connection. Right, we can be friends, we can be emotionally connected and loving and intimate with other people, but with our sexual partner it's such a special connection. It opens us so much more in physical, emotional sense. Yeah, and thank you, ria, I see that yeah, missing feeling desire. And it's not just about, yes, it's not just about physicality. It's really all to do with how much love we can open our hearts, our bodies to and how much we can allow our partners to be there with us. Then I totally believe and that's when I started this work is that we become great role model for our children.
Speaker 1:So, specifically, this is for women who are in a relationship, who want to feel desired and desirable and enjoy heart-melting intimacy. Also, for single women who are ready to let go of all the relational patterns where they keep on feeling unfulfilled and unloved. I actually think being single is such a good time to do this work, because then you're going to attract someone, you're going to choose someone who's so much better for you, because if we don't do this work, I see time and time again that we pick up someone who's quite similar or reminds us of our previous partners. Once we do this work and I notice in myself who am I attracted to is so different, then the relationship can be so much more fulfilling. Also, this is for women who go through separation, and I have these women. I'm doing my course. They go through separation and they want to find their power as a woman, and so it's such a good place to use your current situation to let go of hurtful relational patterns, because when we're going through separation, there's so much openness and it's painful and there's so much more energy that's painful and there's so much more energy that we can really shift things much quicker. So I love working with women who go through separation because there's so much more openness and there's so much more ready to embrace something new.
Speaker 1:Also, this is for women who had enough playing different roles, right. They want to find themselves. They want to know who is. Who am I when I don't take care of my kids anymore? What do I actually want out of my life? What kind of sex and intimacy do I want to create in my life? I don't just want to function, I want joy, I want pleasure, I want fulfillment, I want time for me, and also women who sense the power and they feel like on the brink of sexual awakening. They earn to experience spiritual dimensions of sex. Most of all, this is for women who are done just having sex but desire deep, emotionally connected lovemaking instead.
Speaker 1:Now, just a little bit. If I say a little bit about myself, just why should you listen to me? I'm Tarisha and I started this work in 2010. I'm trained in Hakomi somatic psychotherapy, emotionally focused therapy for couples, breath work, trauma therapy, sacred sexuality and women-centered coaching and facilitation. I've got two degrees in psychotherapy and counseling, so I've done quite a lot on this path.
Speaker 1:As much as now, our society is so much more trauma-informed. We need to do so much more to not carry the load, because there's such a heavy load and I see it in women when we play all the roles. We have past negative experiences and most of us had some negative experiences in our sexuality traumatic experiences. There's still so much more work needs to be done to just let go of all of that. I love to do it in a group of women. I find that when we do it in a group of women, we have so much more power to let go of that load and just start to feel lighter, start to feel more joyful, start to feel more playful.
Speaker 1:Working with groups of women is my favorite way of doing it, and I actually used to be an accountant. I'm trained as a chartered accountant and I worked for Grand Thornton, one of the big firms, and through my journey when I was working as an accountant, I really felt so restricted, I felt like I was in a straitjacket and I felt everything was just useless what I was doing. I've done it for four years and then my body started to feel really in pain. My back was so painful. I've resigned and I was married and I've divorced and I went to travel to find what makes me tick, what brings me joy. I'm so grateful to that version of me when I was 26 that I could live everything and I didn't want to settle. That's what I'd love to give to women that please don't settle. There's so much more that's possible for us and sometimes we have to do tough choices, but For me, traveling around the world and learning from experts, from different coaches from different meditation teachers, how to actually connect to my body, how to connect back to myself and how to find my desire switch so I could turn myself on to life right and to my partner.
Speaker 1:But I understood that it was my inside job, that I had to find the disaster switch inside of me and instead of going for safety being an accountant was all about safety that I can provide for myself I had to break that and start my own business, travel around and really find what makes me tick. I know, when we break things sometimes, that's such a good time to start to build something new, and you don't have to break things in a big's. Such a good time to start to build something new, and you don't have to break things in a big way, right, you don't have to leave the family and everything, but to actually start to see what doesn't work, where do I feel restricted and what do I need to do to find my freedom. That's how I started to do what I'm doing now, because at a certain point, when I was learning so much, I had to give back to other people to be able to take more knowledge, to be able to take more wisdom, more, start to feel more of myself. I was so full with everything that I started to give to people, to women, and now I see how beautiful this work is, so I'm very happy for you to be here. How beautiful this work is, so I'm very happy for you to be here.
Speaker 1:And I wonder where are you at? What is actually happening in your life as it relates to your sexuality and to your body image? Maybe you can take a journal and just journal a bit. Are you frustrated with your sex life? Maybe you've lost your desire. Maybe you see sex as a chore. Maybe you have sex to keep peace. What's happening for you in your life? What brings you here? Maybe you lack confidence. Maybe you feel inexperienced, maybe embarrassed, maybe confused in the bedroom. Sometimes women tell me I feel like a little girl in the bedroom. Maybe you don't feel sexy and attractive. Maybe you feel disconnected from your body and you live more in your head and, as a result, maybe you lack joy in life. Or maybe you had past negative sexual experiences. That takes away the joy and pleasure. Maybe you sense that this is more possible. So reflect just for a moment to write down where am I at? It's so important to know where we're at to be able to go forward, and you can post in comments as well when are you at, what's happening for you, what brings you here? Today, we're going to discover how to feel desired and desirable, how to feel confident and how to feel at home in your body and how to enjoy soul-fulfilling sexual intimacy.
Speaker 1:Yes, they say yes. And that's when I say stacy says she's got an artistic kid and there's not a lot of private time. And yes, that's true, right, our circumstances quite often are less than ideal. It's really difficult, um, when you have a child who needs a lot of attention, and let's see what's through. That's true, right, our circumstances quite often are less than ideal. It's really difficult when you have a child who needs a lot of attention. And let's see what's through this challenge. Let's see what we can do, stacey, because I still think that you could find and what I ask my women to do is to have at least a minute or five minute practice every day.
Speaker 1:There are so many of us. We live so much more in our head than in our bodies, and then we feel frustrated and we don't feel as alive, and so this is not just about sex. It's about reclaiming your desire for life and love, finding your passion, living a joyful and fulfilling life. Women that I've worked with they talk about this. How claim my sexuality. For myself, it's mine. I totally believe that it's now a full power to open our bodies and hearts to love, to find our sexual voice. Then, once we do that, we can invite our partners into authentic, heart-milting and spirit-infused sexual intimacy. I can't stress this enough, but I totally believe we need to open our bodies to love. It's our job. In my experience that through lovemaking we physically create love in our bodies. We create more love in this world. That's the gift of open-hearted lovemaking. It's either for yourself you can do it with yourself, you can do it with your partner but creating more love in our bodies.
Speaker 1:I know that we're frustrated with our sex life. It's not because of other people, but because we need to connect to the ecstatic sexual energy in our bodies. Quite often women tell me like I was disconnected from my sexual energy and now that's not working for me anymore because I don't know where it is. Even I don't have any sexual desire and all the solution is in radical self-responsibility. It's up to us to change our sexual experience. I'm so happy you're here because that's what we're doing here, taking self-responsibility. And, like Faye, she felt so that being a straitjacket right, so restricted in her life and lack desire, actually finding that sexual desire, finding her desire switch what. It helped her also to open up to her creativity more, because our sexuality is so connected to our creativity. So it's not just about sex but it's about being fully expressed in life. So the challenge is am I willing?
Speaker 1:I know that there are a lot of women who stay frustrated, but somehow it makes them feel comfortable. They feel like I don't need to take responsibility, it's all about others, it's because I'm not attracted to my partner anymore. Or they say I don't have time now, or I just can't change this. Or maybe they say when kids grow up, then I'll have time. I really get it because it's like standing in front of the tunnel and you don't know what's on the other side. So even if it's not good right now, sometimes women decide I'll stay here because at least I know, at least that's familiar.
Speaker 1:The problem I see is that we're not getting any younger. I work with too many women late in life where they tell me I wish I knew this before, I wish I met you in my 20s. There's still something that stops women to step forward. So the time to awaken the power and beauty of our sexuality is now. I'm so happy you're here, because it's enough of putting our fulfillment, intimacy, connection on the back burner. The time is now. We're not getting any younger and I totally believe that every day that passes without us feeling empowered and fulfilled is just another day wasted and feeling dissatisfied, stuck, feeling miserable. And if you're single, as I said, it's a perfect time to look at this.
Speaker 1:Yes, stacey, and that's what happened that sometimes we use weight as a protection, quite often because if we're not connected to our body, we don't even know how to look after our body. We don't know what to give to our body. Once we start connecting to our body, it becomes so easy for us to take care of ourselves. And thank you. And yes, it's a process and I'm so happy. Yes, it does take courage to do this work.
Speaker 1:So this is the sexual desire matrix and five aspects, and they're all interconnected. We'll just go aspect by aspect now, and my invitation for you is to just start writing and journaling which one feels like the one you really need to focus on. I invite you to just pick one, maximum two. Ideally you want to go through all fives of them, but it'll be overwhelming, so it's much better if you just pick one or two to start with. So first one which is not first right. They're all in circle and they're all interrelated.
Speaker 1:This is the one we start with self-intimacy. That's the aspect where I see myself. So this pillar focuses on understanding your own body, your own emotions, your sexual desires. It's about cultivating a deep connection with yourself to understand personal needs, preferences in intimate relationships. Check out is this the one that you need to focus on? Self-intimacy? This is a very important aspect because unless I know myself, I can't really tell the other person what I need. Unless I know my deeper desires, I can't express them. Often, women who were so focused on nurturing other people our kids, parents, older parents, our partners we lose a sense of actually what do I want. Often I ask women and they go. I don't even know what I want. So how can I express it to my partner or to other people around me if I don't know what I deeply want and desire? This is so important. This is foundational Developing self-intimacy, seeing ourselves, what do I need, what do I want. Let me know if anyone realized this one.
Speaker 1:Next one is we need to find our erotic voice. What it means is that I know my desires, I've connected to myself and then I'm willing and able and I'm taking the courage to speak them out loud, unapologetically. That's really the ability to articulate our needs, our desires, our boundaries clearly and confidently. This involves open, honest dialogues with yourself, with your partner. Lots of women I work with where we go, we're so used to suppressing our desires, disconnecting from them in order to be in service of other people, that the words get stuck in our throat. We feel the tension, like we feel something, we really want to say it, but then it gets stuck in our throat and we can't express ourselves. Often, if we head past negative sexual experiences in order to protect ourselves, we shut our voice down, we swallow and we suppress it. And I wonder if anyone relates to this one that actually it's difficult for me to express my voice, to find my erotic voice, because so many of us head past sexual traumas. It's just no wonder that we actually can't speak it out loud. We can't share with our partners what we need, what we want. But then, if we're not connected to ourselves, we don't even know. Can you see how it's all related here? We need to have all five aspects opened up in us and then we can create fulfilling sexual intimacy and find our desire.
Speaker 1:Now we're going to intimate resonance. Intimate resonance is there when I see you and I get you and I trust you. I feel like we can play together and feel safe with each other. Then that knowing that you get me and it's all about the importance of emotional intimacy and it can be emotional intimacy with ourselves and with our partners and finding that resonance so we meet each other. That does include developing emotional intelligence, empathy towards yourself, towards your partner. It does require focusing on deeper emotional alignment and connection felt with another human, and also about alignment with yourself and respecting your own boundaries.
Speaker 1:Sometimes I see what happens is that we feel I know myself and this is my desires, this is what I need. I'm just going to say it, and if you don't want to fulfill it, then it doesn't work for me. What's important here to find is actually finding the resonance. Where can we meet each other? Not that I overpower you, not that I'm presenting my desires and needs as a to-do list, right, but actually how can we find resonance and start playing together. It's a process. Yeah, we really need to feel ourselves and we need to feel the other person. When we really find that resonance, that's when the lovemaking becomes so beautiful, because I feel myself, I feel you feeling me. We're doing this together and it creates a sense of togetherness, that beauty, that's what becomes this deep, emotionally connected lovemaking. My invitation for you would be start checking in.
Speaker 1:How do you find resonance with other people? We're not talking about sexual resonance, but just any resonance. When I meet someone, do I find resonance with them or do I just connect them, them or do I just connect into myself? Or do I connect more to them, like I'm more on their side or more on my side, or do I find that space in between of us where we can right, connect and flow and play together? It's a beautiful practice to do. I see some of us go more into the other person and I'm just really there with the other person. I forget myself and some of us stay with ourselves and, whatever the other person saying, I'm not feeling them. So important to feel myself and feel the other person and find that place of resonance. So I wonder if this makes sense. Could you please post in comments if this makes sense? Nice Mil, tell me what makes sense about the resonance? I know that also. More in a mainstream world it's more I'm focusing on others. And then there's this more spiritual world where people start to focus more on themselves and say, no, I just know myself, this is who I am and you have to accept me the way I am. But then it really disregards the effect we're having on other people and not finding that resonance Today. Maybe just start noticing where am I? Where am I? Do I go to the sight of others, to myself? How do I find resonance? Start becoming curious about the space in between. It's such a powerful space.
Speaker 1:As women, we tend to merge with others. Yeah, because and actually we had to learn that, because to feel our children right, we go fully towards our children and we forget ourselves. It's important, it's not a bad thing. That happens. It's part of who we are as women. The gift with us getting older we come to a place actually, oh, I can be with myself as well now, and then I can find that resonance with others.
Speaker 1:So the next step of the sexual desire matrix, aspect number four, is body appreciation. When we feel that my body is my home, that I feel safe in my body and I appreciate everything that my body does for me, then it's all about encouraging this love and accepting the relationship with your body. This aspect is so crucial for feeling comfortable, confident in our sexuality. So I wonder, if we reflect, how do you relate to your body? How do you talk to yourself? Do you judge yourself? When you look in the mirror, what happens? How do you relate to yourself, to your body? Maybe journal a bit? How do you talk to yourself? Is it with love, with appreciation, or is it like, oh, this part needs to change and I need to lose weight here and I need to change there?
Speaker 1:It's not to say that we don't want to change things about our bodies. We might want to be healthier, but it comes from a different place. When it's from a place of appreciation and love, it's because I want to take care of myself. It's not because I'm judging myself and I don't like it. It's quite a different place. Through this course we'll do some practice. But actually, how do I start to love myself and change myself from that place, from taking care of myself and thank you, joyce. And that's what quite often happens. Right After we have kids, our body changes and when we get older, our body changes and we start attacking ourselves.
Speaker 1:We start to become our worst critic and, of course, if I'm criticizing myself, I can't fully relax in my body. Then how can I fully relax and be intimate and sexual with another human being? Because I don't want them to see part of myself right, I'm trying to hide it. Then we can't have deeply fulfilling intimacy. When we're hiding because there's a constriction, we start to constrict, we start to hide ourselves. And to be fully open to another human or to even ourselves, to be open to love, we need to relax, we need to open up our bodies. So, check in right now. If you criticize yourself, notice what happens inside, what happens to your body. If you say something critical to yourself, notice where constriction happens. That'll be another invitation, yeah, for you. Start noticing how you talk to yourself and notice what happens inside. Yeah, there's a thought and quite often we don't even notice what happens, how it affects our body. But when you think negatively to yourself, check in, okay. What happens inside? Is there constriction in my belly, in my heart? What actually happens with me?
Speaker 1:Aspect number five is creative exploration. I find as adults we stop playing, we start to become so serious, we lose that creative exploration. It's just so important for fulfilling sexual life. When I play with others, I share my joy, I share my playfulness with other people and it's all about our willingness to explore and experiment with our sexuality in a safe way, right, safe, consensual ways. It's about learning new ways to experience pleasure, to experience intimacy, because as human beings, we have two needs right. We have a need for safety and we have a need for variety, for something new, for something exciting, for adventure. So how can I, am I willing to explore? How can I bring more playfulness, more adventure into my life with my partner by myself, with my partner by myself? Check out, like now with yourself Am I being playful? How do I play? How do I share my playfulness with others? What I do when I do my 10-week course, what I invite women is to start flirting in a safe way, but flirting in a way of just sharing my joy with other people, sharing the joy of being me with other people, smiling to people and being playful.
Speaker 1:And, of course, quite often, when we're disconnected from our body, when we judge ourselves, when we have past intimacy. Traumas, that heaviness kills our playfulness. That's when life becomes boring, that's when sexual intimacy becomes more an effort than a joy and playfulness. So I wonder how you relate to this one creative exploration, if you can comment. So these are the five aspects of the sexual desire matrix Self-intimacy, erotic voice, intimate resonance, body appreciation and creative exploration. I invite you to choose one aspect that you want to focus on that you feel will be the key for you. That can unlock lots of other doors. Later you can do the other ones right, all of them are very important and they're all interconnected. I do invite you in the comments in the group to share which pillar you feel like you need to work on and maybe, if you can respond to at least three women so we can keep that communication connection going on with the group, you can send them a sense of support, because it's so nice to be supported when we're talking about our sexuality and I know for some of us it's a painful subject.
Speaker 1:Anyone wants to focus on the creative exploration and it doesn't need to be scary, right, it's just one little step. How can I play a bit more? That's what Julia right. She really said that doing the practices helped her immensely to improve her relationship with her body and then the sexuality, sexual desire starts to flow. Also, she says I feel like I have made a big step from feeling like a little girl towards being a powerful woman. That's inside of me, that's the piece that I see happen so often is when somehow, when we go into the bedroom, we drop into being a little girl rather than an adult woman. It's not appropriate for little girls to feel sexual right and then we feel lost. What we need to do is to start connecting to the adult woman in us, so the adult can take care of the inner child, but actually to be sexual, connect to our adult woman and that's the one who goes forward, that's the one who connects with another. And Joe, yes, that's the piece. When we feel more confident, then we can be more playful and more fun. So that's how it all interrelates.
Speaker 1:What can you do today to create more play in your life? If you've got any questions, if you post them in the comments. To create more play in your life? If you've got any questions, if you post them in the comments, my invitation for you that don't wait for heart-melting sex, but cause it to happen in your life and going through the sexual desire matrix and looking at all five aspects. That's what's really going to change the way you relate to yourself sexually and to others.
Speaker 1:Tomorrow we're going to go more into how do we actually awaken our desire. We're going to create a new story for your sex life. We're going to start awakening the power and beauty of your desire and we're going to start bringing more love, more beauty into your sexuality and connecting your sexuality to your heart. On day three, we're going to look at the barriers to our desire, which is a really important aspect, because if we've got the barriers, we can't feel playful and joyful and sexual and confident. We really need to look at the barriers. We can't feel playful and joyful and sexual and confident. We really need to look at the barriers. And then we're going to look at how to create heart milty and spirit infused intimacy.
Speaker 1:If I want to focus, like Mil says, on the logic voice, what would it look like? What actually am I doing? Is it that I'm really connecting to my desires and just trying to voice at least one desire a day with resonance? What am I going to do? Is it that anyone I meet? I'm going to just check out? Where is that space in between us? What is the next step? What can I do? How can I practice that? Please post your questions. The more questions you ask me, the more I can design something that really helps you.